hitting rock bottom... or, i just turned 26

my 26th birthday was last week, and for the first time, i genuinely felt sad at being one year older.

I don't know what it is, but 26 seems to me like the beginning of the end. the end of the days where you can blame your carelessness, absentmindedness, and selfishness on youth and inexperience. the end of the days you can shrug off 'adult' responsibility like mortgages, financial planning, and career/job worries.

26 is when you officially enter the rat race as a full fledged Rat. when the endless string of weddings, baby showers, and engagements never cease to remind you that your biological clock is ticking, and why haven't you found a partner yet??

but then as I write this I survey my surroundings. clothes strewn around the floor? check. stuffed animals on the bed? check. unfiled tax returns? check. I am clearly not ready to be a Rat. (and right, who wants to be called a rat anyways?)